“This should take about two hours. The questions are a lot like personality tests you take on Facebook or something,” the in-house therapist, who also happened to be the shrink’s wife, said. Clearly, confidentiality won’t be an issue at the dinner table later that night.
“Great, a post about discourse on a blog. It was only a matter of time before this personal blog got political…” Says his two followers…
And it’s true. I’ve only really used this blog to show some of my introspective thoughts on different shit, so I agree, it makes no sense as to why I’m going to get political…(blatant sarcasm if someone didn’t pick up on that.)
I am not a member of the recently and completely made up coalition of Workers for a Tatted America.
I have tattoos. I have a quarter sleeve of a compass and anchor that is an homage to my grandmother coupled with a line from a J.R.R. Tolkien poem on my left shoulder and bicep. I also have the lyric “Sorry For The Mess” from the Vance Joy song, Mess is Mine, written in cursive sitting beneath an ink bottle and old-fashioned fountain pen in the minimalist and over-priced style on my right forearm.
There is a scene from a Justice League Unlimited episode where the Justice League was taking on a Lex Luther infused Braniac, and the only way the heroes could defeat the villain was for the Flash to run so fast he could barely be seen by Luther. Long story short, the Flash rounded the world over and over again to break through Luther’s defense, but he runs so fast that he is unable to stop. Everything stands still and everything is silent. Obviously in the episode, the Flash and the rest of the Justice League never wants to be presented with a moment like that again. It scared him and the team almost lost a member of their hero gang.
“I think and think and think, I‘ve thought myself out of happiness one million times, but never once into it.”
― Jonathan Safran Foer – Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close
A quote in a novel I did not read, (besides in the Google search for “quotes about thinking,”) nor did I see the film adaptation so I could not tell you if the quote made its way to the silver screen. I can tell you, however, that Tom Hanks is in the film, so it is probably decent enough to check out…
I like to think that I think often and about things that pertain to pertinence. It is certainly pertinent to me, but not by societal norms at all.
I think about how uncomfortable I am wearing what I call my monkey suit, which is just pants and a button-up shirt. I think about whether or not the AC will be functioning at work because I wear an undershirt to go along with the button-up shirt or else the button-up is way too itchy and I feel awkward if I have to raise arms for anything. I think about how I wish I was talking to people on NPR because to talk idly through intellectualism is so fascinating to me. I think about needing to get gas on the ride home from work when I am driving to work, and regret not being able to think up an excuse to not go to work because I have exhausted most excuses already. I think about ways to avoid doing work while at work, but at the same time I think about getting other work in a different job. I probably apply to three jobs a day while I am sitting at my desk.
I would not describe it as overthinking. Personally, it is just what I need to think about at that particular time. Exhausting, yet necessary.
But if one were to dissect Foer’s quote and view it through the lens that is my psyche, it would seriously hit home, give or take a few happy thoughts here and there throughout the years. By no means am I saying that I am consistently unhappy. Perhaps the idea of happy is better left to the individual, and even that is simulated through a case-by-case basis. What I am saying is that happiness is just a thought and it is tough to think about when there is so much else to think about.
There is something extremely alluring about the thought of being isolated. Being a hermit, a mystical all-knower, completely and totally cut off from everything and everyone. The image, that flutters past my psyche as I daydream at work about being completely content with where my mind is currently, is as follows: Continue reading
I cheat sometimes.
Not on purpose. I cheat when necessity overcomes integrity.
Necessity: to fuel myself when there is a lack there of.
Necessity: to not offend or just when no one is looking.
Necessity: because someone is looking.